Random poems from waking early...5am

Fuck jar sauce!

Struck with fear
quaking in my boots
"Oh my god am I an artist
can I really paint!"
I carefully set my brush aside
I think I'm gonna faint
quaking in my boots
struck with fear
I've come over all queer!
"Oh wait I dont give a fuck what you think!"
I said while painting like Dali but in pink.

Elf

It's like Christmas
and I'm up high upon a shelf
I'm stuck inside feeling sorry for my self
I'm dressed in green
and guilt for all to see
what's to become of me

Obvious.

It was obvious that my life was catty wampus 

as I slowly realised I was being pompus

It was obvious to see for everyone but me

that my life was obviously catty wampus.

Bit later.

I can be very grumpy

and easily un-amused 

"keep that big fat gob shut"

unless you wanna be abused

so If you like shin kicking

and being patted 

violently like a pet

pop round 

have some tea

I haven't started yet!